I have countless photographs of Zoey. I created one album with at least one picture from each day of her life. We have amazing videos our friends put together of both her life and her memorial service. Immediately after Zoey’s death, these projects gave me a direction, a focus when I had nothing else. Organizing her memorial service also gave me a purpose. I worried more about it being perfect than I ever worried about our wedding ceremony and reception. While getting the anchor tattoo and designing my “Zoey ring” provide me with permanent reminders of Zoey, the actual process didn’t last long. I was again left with no real direction. I need to keep moving– that’s my coping mechanism. Going back to work helped some, but it didn’t mean anything to Zoey. It didn’t honor her in any way. It doesn’t keep her close to me.
My friends have been running races in her honor (again, I’ll talk more about them another day). I need to run one for her too. I set my mind to do another half marathon. The others have been for me. This one would be for her. But the only one I could really see as the perfect fit is the Disney Princess at Disney World. We took Zoey to Disney while I was pregnant with her. I needed her to feel the magic. Meet Mickey Mouse. Meet the princesses. And after all, Zoey is our little princess. So on February 22, I will run it for Zoey.
As part of the race, I will be fundraising for Children’s Miracle Network. They provide funds to both hospitals that provided us with support through my pregnancy and Zoey’s life. My sweet friend, Nicol, who is crazy for doing this– but is even more amazing– has agreed to run and fundraise with me. I didn’t even have to talk her into it. I sent her the link and she registered.
Please consider helping us reach our goal. Both by cheering us on when you see us out on the road in the middle of winter logging our training miles to supporting our fundraising efforts.
I do this in memory of my daughter. My princess– the most beautiful one of them all. Every step, every drop of sweat, every mile will help me feel close to Zoey, help me heal and help me honor my daughter.
(I’m pretty sure this photo was taken right after Cinderella asked when we’d be bringing Zoey back to see her…)